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Use your body (1)

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In my case, when I try to change some undesired behavior, mental exercise provides a temporary solution but usually no sustainable results.

The good news is however that undesired behavior (ultimately) always translates into some kind of physical discomfort. Growing an ongoing awareness of these (small or large) discomforts in a compassionate manner somehow activates behavioral change in a healthy and sustainable way. Main reason being that physical discomforts are easier to spot, allow a more objective analysis and more difficult to hide or disregard than mental discomforts.

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Can I talk before I walk?

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One of things I’m still struggling with is that I’m ‘preaching’ concepts like: transparency, openness, vulnerability, authenticity, natural purpose, sustainability etc. whilst I’m not fully there myself… So when I speak to others about this I also speak to myself!

Somehow that doesn’t feel right. My temporary solution is to be open about the fact that I’m not there yet. Hence this small post about the process I’m still going through!

Training the mind is quite a challenge. The picture below (I took in a Tibetan monastery 2 years ago) depicts a well known buddhist tale about the meditator (you and me), the elephant (representing our ‘mind’) and the monkey (representing ‘distraction’).

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Letting go of old shoes…

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… without knowing when you’ll be able to get new ones. That is something that I have often tried to avoid. I like to keep my old ones until I’m sure the new ones fit perfectly. Specially when it concerns an area where I have seen others getting into trouble because they didn’t.

But this time it seems I really have to let go before I know where I will land. For a while I have tried to follow my trusted method as I’m migrating to a next phase in my ‘professional’ live but somehow it does not work anymore. Not being able of letting go actually prevents me from discovering what is next.

Creative, Rational and Useless

Creative, Rational and Useless

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Organizing energy (2)

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Whilst gradually moving the organizations I’m involved with towards ‘self management’ (to liberate their full natural potential) I encountered a number of personal issues. These may be worth sharing as my success / failure as a (former) director to understand and cope with these issues greatly influenced the pace and success of the transition of the organization as a whole.

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Trail preparation, Lac d’Oo, Pyrenees (1)

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Testing a new destination for transformation trails in August. Some parts of the Pyrenees are as wild and remote as Scotland but not so wet and… less midges. It takes a 2 hours flight to Toulouse (FR) and a 2 hours drive to the starting point in Les Granges d’Astau. Followed by a healthy walk up the mountain to our base camp, le Refuge du lac d’Oo.

Lac-dO-770x386

Basic program set up remains the same: Continue reading →

Blue Purpose

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 As you probably know by now, my aim is to help people find and live their natural purpose in life. I recently read Blue Zones, a scientific study by Dan Buettner & National Geographic that supports my intuitive theory on the importance of knowing and living your personal purpose. This study concludes that having a clear sense of purpose is one of the 9 differentiating lifestyle habits that make that people in these blue zones live a longer, happier and healthier life (past age 100!). Continue reading →

Organizing energy (1)

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Having grown various start ups into large organizations I always wondered about the loss of energy and dynamics as we grew. I have therefor tested all kind of organizational structures in an attempt to maintain the energy that is so readily available in the beginning. My conclusion is that the only sustainable solution is to organize yourself in such a manner that every individual is intrinsically connected to the purpose of the organization but is at the same time completely free to act as he or she feels right within his or her area of responsibility. Continue reading →

Magic mushrooms

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I’m not a cook. Nor is cooking my passion. Making a wide range of quite tasty and good looking dishes just based on whatever happens to be around is however relatively easy for me. And I do have a passion for preparing a meal and a table for others. My aim is to create an atmosphere that triggers people to share live stories and laughters and to listen to each other compassionately. Moments that people will remember. I gather ideas around this in my red indian made scrap book on the picture just below.

2015-04-18 14.35.23 Continue reading →

Life stories

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Listening closely to life stories from people you meet during your day can be a wonderful source of inspiration when designing your own roadmap towards your natural purpose. To trigger a true life story is quite simple. It is all about posing one question and that question is: Which events in your life made that you are where you are now? Continue reading →

My first U

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My first major step on the road back to my own natural purpose was when I found myself in a dead end career street. This was in Singapore in 1996. After years of slowly moving forward based on force, denial and perseverance I could no longer pretend that everything was allright. I did not get fired, there was no burn out or other big crisis but I felt very much alone and unhappy. People did’t see me or when they did, preferred to avoid me. Nobody respected my insights or work. In hindsight this proved to be a blessing in disguise. It made me rent a small boat for a trip along the coast of Borneo. That is when I started listening closely to myself instead of others…  Continue reading →

Sensing what is (1)

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Stillness and mediation are strong allies when reconnecting to your natural purpose. After trying various forms of (guided) meditation and I find myself the most comfortable with Vipassana. It is in my view the most natural and pure vorm of contemplation (as personally developed by Buddha). It only requires to observe without reacting (easier said than done). It excludes chanting, verbalization, visualization or other techniques that disturb from fully sensing whatever is at a certain point in time. Continue reading →

Deep listening

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I’m,  by about 5 to 10 years, younger then my 3 older brothers. This age difference was too big to really connect to my brothers when still young. As a consequence I more or less grew up as an only child. Mostly observing what was happening around me with a minimum of communication and interaction.

To still be able to evaluate people and situations I had to develop strong sensing skills. Having difficulty acquiring knowledge through reading (because of dyslexia) also demanded above average  ‘listening’ and ‘guessing’ skills. But only much later, when my self confidence was restored, these various ‘survival techniques’ became real assets from which I now benefit on a daily basis Continue reading →

(Solo) retreat

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Spending time alone in the wild used to be quite common for centuries. As part of initiation rites or when in need to (re)connect to deeper layers or to sense the right way forward in line with your natural purpose. A beautiful book about the value of this time spent in the wild is Iron John by Robert Bly. It describes the value of recognizing and embracing your ‘dark’ side in order to become ‘one’ and move forward again. I can especially recommend the first half of this book (it only deals with the male side of things though). Continue reading →

Conflict as source for change

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My default mode (from childhood onwards) has always been to avoid conflicts in other to maintain the perception of harmony. With some training & hard work… training I have know learned to embrace conflicts as a valuable source of information for change and improvement. To get to that point (still not 100% there…) I first studied Non violent communication as developed by Marshall Rosenberg and got inspired by the likes of Renee Brown talking about the reasons behind our fear for conflicts, such as not being able to be vulnerable (in certain situations). Continue reading →

Base camp

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Finding a space that matches the spirit of QOL was quite a challenge and took about 5 years. Westbroek combines authenticity, ample true nature (by NL standards), beautiful skies and long days. It’s the perfect place for slowing down, listening to inner voices, (re)connection with oneself and others, long walks and talks, mindful cooking, eating and drinking. It is also nearby so travel time is limited. Continue reading →

Balancing hart, mind and business

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One of my personal roadblocks was that I extensively trained myself to (try to) control my world through my mind and ‘manipulative’ behavior. I’m smart enough (as we all are) to create a logical and ‘objective’ explanation for my own ideas and behavior. Truly believing, as a consequence, that my views are superior to the views of others or even to the laws of nature. So one of my bigger challenges was to create a healthier balance by gradually  allowing more and more space for my hart and intuition. Un-learning this bias towards the mind required a lot of patience and perseverance. Continue reading →