As a (transformative) mediator I take a professional interest in the many tensions currently playing out in the world. I then start pondering what my approach would be if and when asked to contribute to de-escalation and resolution.

Designing an approach for individuals, organization or countries is probably not that different. Meeting both parties where they are at that moment and start from there. Holding space so that each party can gradually re-empower themselves and regain acces to the energy needed to detach themselves from their wounds. And to subsequently start seeing the other in a more open and compassionate manner.

Often however, the respective pain is still too big to handle. And is staying in conflict considered as the only viable survival strategy. Even if further escalation is the likely consequence.

As (often resolution prone) mediator it can be a challenge to accept that that is what is possible at that moment. Short cutting this proces by more intrusive interventions results in short term relief but more often than not in artificial and unstable solutions.

Gradually building my (vipassana) meditation practice helps me to build the equanimous energy required to hold regenerative space for others. And not to loose myself in actions mainly meant to alleviate my own unhelpful cravings (for peace and harmony) and aversions (for abuse and impermanence). It helps me to stay connected in the midst of turmoil and to radiate connection and oneness instead. And to be compassionate towards myself when I fail.

Maybe therefore my challenge in conflicts is to accept that my contribution, also as a hired mediator, is limited to taking care of the quality of my own state of being at any one moment. Followed by trust and possibly connected actions. Not that easy when exposed to the conflicts currently dominating our media and lives.