A sharp and sensitive mind requires an open and vulnerable attitude. I’m therefore happy to be able to report some progress in this, quite challenging, area. As evidenced by Yoga poses that were previously totally impossible for me such as the (beginners version of the) bridge pose below.
However sometimes when confronted with certain tensions I can still quickly fall back in fierce defensive behavior… immediately followed by quickly collapsing bridges… Fortunately these ‘relapses’ are steadily becoming more rare and more brief. And also getting better at not blaming myself for this afterwards.
Background information: This occasion was about an unexpected (but long desired…) moment of truth that came up but dissolved just before materialising. Instead of accepting this reality I tried to make it go away. Thereby counter-productively only strengthening the underlying tension that prevented it from happening.
By the way: My first bridge was a fact before I actually realised what I was doing. It came up without any consious effort. I was somehow ready.