My default mode (from childhood onwards) has always been to avoid conflicts in other to maintain the perception of harmony. With some training & hard work… training I have know learned to embrace conflicts as a valuable source of information for change and improvement. To get to that point (still not 100% there…) I first studied Non violent communication as developed by Marshall Rosenberg and got inspired by the likes of Renee Brown talking about the reasons behind our fear for conflicts, such as not being able to be vulnerable (in certain situations).
Subsequently I got myself trained as a certified conflict mediator and established Natural Mediators, a practice focusing on social and healthcare related conflicts. I also joined Buurtbemiddeling, a volunteer organization focusing on resolving a large variety of neighborhood conflict.
Behavioral change is always a challenge as we probably all know only to well. Often a serious roadblock is needed to move from awareness about the need to change to real action. These roadblocks generally come at quite a price (health, relations, jobs, etc.). It is therefor a pity to waste the early signals provided by small and larger conflicts.
QOL focuses on embracing conflicts in order to remove and preferably avoid roadblocks that hinder your progress on your journey to your natural self.